Yardstick

I went to a Catholic grade school. One of the most important things you do when you are in 2nd grade is study for your 1st communion.

Back in the day we had the Baltimore Catechism. To this day, I know many people whose faith has not grown beyond what they learned in the Baltimore Catechism….

You might remember some of the questions:

1….Who made us……God made us.

2…Who is God… God is the Creator of heaven and earth, and of all things.

3…..Why did God make us…. God made me to know Him, to love Him, and to serve Him in this world, and to be happy with Him forever in heaven.

To make your 1st Communion you had to not only study the Baltimore Catechism, but you were constantly quizzed on the questions and you had better know the answers.

One thing about Catholic Schools in the 1950s…. we had nuns. They were real sticklers when it came to learning your Catechism.

“I would like you to go home tonight and review all these questions and tomorrow we will have a quiz.”

I went home that night….I studied and highlighted, took notes and went over the questions and answers multiple times. I was going to be ready and know all the answers.

The next day, in class the nun decided to have an oral quiz. I was in the 1st row and she started asking the 1st question to the 1st person in my row. The 2nd question went to the person in the 2nd seat.

I sensed, there is a pattern going on here… Now let me see. I am in seat number 7, that means I am going to get question number 7. What is that question? I know I know the answer. What was that question? Let me take a sneak peek in my book.

Ahhhh. Question 7

“Mister Hutchinson. Will you please come up here.”
Why did you open the book….”

I did not open the book.

I was caught red handed. There was no lying my way out of this one…

“Come here Mister Hutchinson…
Stick your hand out.”

Wow….What is going on…. What have I got myself into…

At this point, she reaches back and on the ledge of the chalk board is a yardstick…

Uh Oh…

“I said stick out your hand…”

I’m thinking….What are you going to do with that yardstick…

Crack….

Not only did she hit my hand with the yardstick…

The yardstick breaks.

The nun is very upset now…

“Now look what you done…
you are going to have to buy me a new yardstick.”

What…

Not only am I experiencing pain…now you are going to make me pay you for your infliction…

Is this some sort of Purgatory….

“You have to bring in $2.00 tomorrow so I can buy a new yardstick.”

I am thinking…

Well the yardstick wouldn’t have broken if you didn’t hit me with it.

Lying…Is that a venial sin…

Can I still make my 1st Holy Communion…

For those of you worrying…

Yes I did receive my 1st Communion and I went on to be an altar boy in later years…

Dominus Vobiscum…..Et cum spiritu tuo…

The Magic Bank Account

Recently, a friend reached out to me and sent the below message. Thank you, John, for thinking of me. I would like to share it with you…

George, This is you!

John

THE AUTHOR IS NOT KNOWN.   IT WAS FOUND IN THE BILLFOLD OF
COACH PAUL BEAR BRYANT, ALABAMA, AFTER HE DIED IN 1982.

The Magic Bank Account

Imagine that you had won the Following *PRIZE* in a contest:

Each morning your bank would deposit $86,400 In your private account
for your use…..
However, this prize has Rules:
The set of Rules:

1. Everything that you didn’t spend during each day would be taken away from
you.

2. You may not simply transfer money into some other account.

3. You may only spend It.

4. Each morning upon awakening, the bank opens your account with another
$86,400 for that Day.

5. The bank can end the game without warning; at any time, it can say,

Game Over!” It can close the account and you will not receive a new one.

What would you personally do?

You would buy anything and everything you wanted right?  Not only
for yourself, but for all the people you love and care for.  Even for
people you don’t know because you couldn’t possibly spend it all on
yourself, right?

You would try to spend every penny, and use it all, because you knew
it would be replenished in the morning, right?

ACTUALLY, This GAME is REAL…   Shocked ???
YES!

Each of us is already a winner of this *PRIZE*. We just can’t seem to see
it.

The PRIZE is *TIME*

1. Each morning we awaken to Receive 86,400 seconds as a gift of Life.

2. And when we go to sleep at night, any remaining time is not credited to us.

3. What we haven’t used up that day is forever lost.

4. Yesterday is forever gone.

5. Each morning the account is refilled, but the bank can dissolve your
account at any time WITHOUT WARNING…

SO, what will YOU do with your 86,400 seconds?

Those seconds are worth so much more than the same amount in dollars.
Think about it and remember to enjoy every second of your life, because
time races by so much quicker than you think.

So take care of yourself, be Happy, love deeply and enjoy life!

Here’s wishing you a wonderful and beautiful day…
Start spending….

“DON’T COMPLAIN ABOUT GROWING OLD!”

SOME PEOPLE DON’T GET THE PRIVILEGE!

 

Every Day is a Gift

It Is a Small World After All

I walked onto the beach the other day

After setting up my chair

I went over to one of the guys

I have met on the beach

Over the past couple of years

 

It was the 1^st time I have seen him

On the beach this year

 

I said…

It’s good to see you again

Are you ready for

Another great summer…

 

At that point

I felt a little embarrassed

I stopped and said…

 

I’m sorry…

But I forget your first name

I’m George Hutch

 

He just chuckled and said…

 

Just call me JC

That’s always easy to remember

 

We got into some small talk

And then he started talking about the beach…

 

The beach is already getting a little crowded…

I can’t believe it…

People are just plopping down

Sitting on top of each other…

 

Look at all the beach over there

 

And those people going into the water…

The life guards are 2 blocks away…

 

What are they thinking…

They are putting other people at risk…

 

I casually said…

I think you will like the book I just wrote…

 

You wrote a book…

What’s the title…

 

Beach Etiquette…

 

He turns to his wife…

 

Hey KC…

Come over here

 

Remember that book you just bought me…

 

Beach Etiquette

 

Here’s the guy who wrote it

 

I love that book

I was always thinking I should write a book about

Beach Etiquette

 

You did a good job

 

I was sitting drinking my coffee the other day

And I read a couple of chapters…

 

I found myself laughing

It’s pretty funny…

 

I love the art work

 

Wow…

How about that…

 

It is a small world after all…

 

In case you are interested

Check out our website…

 

https://beachetiquettebook.com/

 

Several people have told me

They bought a copy

And after reading it…

 

They went back and bought more copies

To give to their friends

 

I’ll take that as a compliment

 

I am glad people are enjoying the book

 

If you would like a few laughs

I invite you to read the book

Leave a review on Amazon…

 

The buzz is out there…

This is a grassroots campaign

 

We need your help to keep it going

 

We can all brush up on our Beach Etiquette

Get Your DNA Here

If you have been watching tv at night lately

 

You have probably seen the commercials…….

 

 

“I found out I was 20% Native American….

 

 

I thought I was Italian but I’m actually German”….

 

 

(I find myself saying……

 

Ya vol herr Kommandant….

 

For no apparent reason)…

 

 

That is for you Hogan Hero fans…

 

 

Contact Ancestry.com and get your DNA results today

 

 

I was thinking…

 

This might be a great gift for my wife’s birthday

 

So I contacted the company and ordered 2 DNA kits

 

 

Wellllllllllll……..

 

The results are in

 

 

When people ask

 

So what nationality are you….

 

 

I would normally say Irish and English

 

My mother was 100% Irish

 

My Pop….75% Irish and 25% English

 

 

My wife is 50% Italian from her father’s side

 

A mix of Irish and Scotch from her mother’s side

 

 

When the results came in

 

My wife was shown as…..

 

38% Italian

26% Irish

20% Great Britain

6% Western Europe

 

What happen to the Scotch…..

 

Is that filed under Great Britain….

 

 

My results came in a couple days later

 

I am……

 

Drum roll please…..

 

92% Irish

4% Italian / Greek

2% Western Europe

 

 

Not even a trace of English blood

 

Or as they say Great Britain….

 

 

Hey hun….I’m 4% Italian

 

 

You’re not Italian

 

 

It says here I am 4% Italian

 

That means I am only 34% less Italian than you

 

 

That got her blood pumpin….

 

 

You’re not Italian

 

You’re gonna deny me my 4%

 

 

Well….I have had a lot of fun knowing the results

 

 

I still can’t believe….No English

 

But 4% Italian….

 

 

Those Romans really gotta around

 

 

 

 

What does your DNA say….

 

 

It may makes for good conversation…